Today I flirted with a man with one leg and he flirted back

It was one of those situations you find yourself in where you’re walking in the opposite direction of someone and are about to pass them and neither of you know which side to take, so there’s an awkward dance before one of you plows through, forcing the other to whichever side is left open.

Except for his dance, he popped a wheelie using his wheelchair. And it was so incredibly hot (and so was he, which helped).

He looked up at me and we both smiled; after passing, both of us looked behind us and I managed to get a wink from him as he turned the corner, one leg of his jeans tucked under his butt. It made my day.

Actually, it was one of two things that made my day.

After I left hot amputee boy, I jumped on the skytrain and ran into a friend of a friend. She has a craniofacial disorder and can’t see out of one of her eyes. We chatted from uptown through to downtown. She bitched about her partner; I beamed about mine. We parted ways and I headed to another train bound for home, where I got a text from our mutual friend telling me that the woman had called her after she got off the train to tell her how incredibly nice I was, but more importantly to me, considering the day, how hot she thought I was.

I don’t brag. I’m writing about this because shit like this never happens to me. I got hit on by a boy with one leg and was admired by a girl with one working eye, and I feel so fucking sexy…

Actually, does that ever happen to anyone?

I’ll admit. Amputees are a bit of a turn-on for me. Legs only though. And oddly enough, boys only. Hot, buff, athletic boys only. It all started one hot summer day about eight years ago in August, where I was spending the day with my then girlfriend and caught a glimpse of this strikingly attractive man learning how to roll in a kayak. The instructor wasn’t sure how to deal with this man’s bionic leg, but said man was confident – wearing shorts showing the full gear (a plus!) – and had a fuck-it-I-can-do-what-everyone-else-can-do attitude that was such a turn on that I didn’t want to leave the lake.

I joke about it all the time: Just think of the positions you could do it in! But in real life, I like women with two legs (and preferably two working eyes).

I’m lucky to have just that, though with how hot I was feeling about myself and the fact that she is away, I didn’t really know what to do with myself when I got home and had the evening to myself. Well, I knew, but, you know…

I’m chiming in a little late on the sex topic posts. And I think that’s about all I’m going to say. That’s what one-legged kinks and cross-eyed fantasies are for now, aren’t they?

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